Page 4

     Night.  Karen lay in bed, almost asleep.  She didn't feel comfortable in her apartment, but she didn't want to stay with her parents either.

     "I missed you, Sarah."

     The voice was back.  Sarah giggled.  She hadn't laughed much since her stay at Karen's parents' house.  Karen felt her pulse rate double.  "Where were you?  Did she take you away?  I was worried. When you came here I knew you wouldn't be like the others.  They all left me, but that won't happen with you, will it?"

     Sarah laughed.  Karen sat up and stared at the monitor.  She bit her lip until she tasted blood.

     "You like me, don't you?  You want to be with me, right?  Not with her."

     Sarah cooed and Karen couldn't take it anymore.  She ran into the room screaming.  "Get out of here!  Leave my baby alone!  You can't do this to me!"

     Sarah started crying.

     Karen shouted and screamed until her headbanging neighbors pounded on the wall.  "Hey!  Keep it down over there!"

     She clenched her fists and dropped to her knees.  The neighbors cranked the volume on their stereo.  A guitar ripped through the wall like a chainsaw.  Sarah screamed louder.  It was too much.  Karen stood and ran from the room in tears.

     As she entered her bedroom, she heard the voice over the monitor as it whispered.

     "She doesn't love you the way I do, Sarah.  She left you." The voice took on a harsher tone and Karen knew it was addressing her now more than Sarah.  "She doesn't have the bond we share. She's losing control, but don't worry.  Mommy will protect you."

#

     "I have to get out of here," Karen said.  Her face was puffy, her eyes bloodshot.  She held the phone receiver between her ear and shoulder as she tried to feed Sarah.  The baby refused to eat. "I can't take any more."

     "Any more what?" her mother asked.

     Karen sniffled and mumbled something unintelligible.

     "What is it, honey?" her mother asked.  "Slow down and tell your mother what's wrong."

     "Everything."

     "It can't be that bad.  What in particular?"

     "This apartment."

     "What about it?"

     "It gives me the creeps."

     "Being on your own is difficult."

     "No, it's not that." Karen said through her tears.  She rubbed her nose and took a deep breath.  She set Sarah down, but kept one shaking hand resting on her arm, afraid to relinquish physical contact.  "It's just that this place doesn't feel safe.  We need to move out."

     "What about your lease?"

     "Who cares?  I ... stay still, Sarah.  Hang on a sec, Mom." Karen set the phone down and picked Sarah up, trying to find a comfortable position.  Sarah cried and Karen held the bottle near the baby's mouth.  "Come on, Sarah, eat."  Sarah pushed the bottle away.  "Please?" Karen begged and finally, Sarah stopped crying and ate.

     Karen considered telling her mother about the voice--that it wasn't her neighbors--but decided against it.  She didn't want her mother to worry that she was going insane.  Even if it were true.  What if she tried to take Sarah, saying Karen was an unfit mother?  Karen composed herself and lifted the receiver.

     "I'm back, Mom."

     "Are you all right?"

     "Yeah.  I'm okay now."

     "Good.  I hate to hear you like this.  I know it's been tough for you since Mark left.  I talked to your father today.  He says he'll pay for you to attend classes at Metro if you live here."

     "Move home?"  The voice wasn't there, but....

     "It's best, Karen.  I can help out.  Just say yes."

     "Okay," Karen said.  She could trust her mother.  "Yes."

#

     That night, when Karen was almost asleep, she heard the voice over the monitor again.

     "She's going to try to steal you away from me, Sarah," the voice hissed.  "But I won't let that happen.  I'm your real mommy. I'll always be with you."

     Karen smashed the monitor.  "You're not real!" she shouted at the broken bits of plastic.  "This is all in my mind!"  She walked into Sarah's room and stared at her baby.  Sarah was laughing at nothing, reaching out as if she wanted to be picked up.  Karen used to think that meant she had a happy baby.

     She moved the crib into her bedroom.  Now Sarah verged on the edge of tears, whimpering.  She seemed almost as frightened as Karen felt.  "Don't cry, Sarah," Karen said.  "If we can just make it through tonight, we'll be safe at home."

     Karen climbed into bed and closed her eyes.  She heard Sarah cooing in the dark.  She tried to think about her quilt at home. About how happy she and Sarah were going to be.  Think of good things and just sleep.

     Sarah laughed and Karen sat up.  The voice was right there whispering to the baby and without the monitor, Karen had no way of knowing what the voice was saying.  She shouldn't have destroyed the damn thing.

     She turned on the lights and went to the crib.  "Shh, Sarah. I'm trying to sleep."  Sarah looked at her, then looked at the other side of the crib and smiled.  Karen picked her up and she started crying.  "Don't cry, Sarah.  I love you."

     But Sarah kept crying and Karen felt her own tears threaten to spill.  She placed Sarah back in the crib and went to get some Kleenex.  When she came back, Sarah was laughing at nothing.

     Karen knew it was the voice whispering to her.  "No!" Karen yelled.  "Sarah is my baby, not yours!  You leave her alone!"

     Sarah looked over at Karen and frowned.  Then looked away and smiled.

     Karen shook her head.  This couldn't be happening.  She wanted to run to Sarah and take her away, but the baby cried if Karen even looked at her.  Karen backed out of the room, tears staining her cheeks.

#

     Karen moved home the next day.  Her father had left the Metro schedule on her night stand.  She smiled and began unpacking.  It was late at night before she had the crib set up and the clothes put away.  Her father had left for work.  Her mother was asleep in the master bedroom and Karen was exhausted.  She wanted to lie down and sleep for days.  She leaned over the crib and tickled Sarah, who grinned.  Here at home, they were safe.  The voice couldn't follow them here.

     "Good night, Sarah," Karen said.

     She turned out the lights and stretched out on her bed, pulling the quilt up to her chin.  She breathed deeply and sighed. Relaxed for the first time in ages.  Tomorrow, she'd sign up for night classes and she'd get her life back on track.

     She drifted off for a time, but snapped awake in the middle of the night.  She tried to sit up, but she was tangled in the quilt.  The hair stood up on the back of her neck and a chill raced down her spine.  She swore she felt a presence in the room, but she couldn't see or hear anyone.

     A moment later, Sarah giggled.